“Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.”
― Robert A. Heinlein

“If cats looked like frogs we'd realize what nasty, cruel little bastards they are. Style. That's what people remember.”
― Terry Pratchett, Lords and Ladies

“I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
CATS, he said eventually. CATS ARE NICE.”
― Terry Pratchett, Sourcery

“Owners of dogs will have noticed that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they will think you are god. Whereas owners of cats are compelled to realize that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they draw the conclusion that they are gods.”
― Christopher Hitchens, The Portable Atheist: Essential Readings for the Nonbeliever

Albert Schweitzer
“There are two means of refuge from the misery of life — music and cats.”
― Albert Schweitzer

“What do you mean "Ewww"?
How is my tuna breath worse
than peanut butter?”
― Lee Wardlaw, Won-Ton: A Cat Tale Told in Haiku

“Meow” means “woof” in cat.”
― George Carlin

“What's your name,' Coraline asked the cat. 'Look, I'm Coraline. Okay?'
'Cats don't have names,' it said.
'No?' said Coraline.
'No,' said the cat. 'Now you people have names. That's because you don't know who you are. We know who we are, so we don't need names.”
― Neil Gaiman, Coraline

“One day I was counting the cats and I absent-mindedly counted myself.”
― Bobbie Ann Mason, Shiloh and Other Stories

“If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much.”
― Mark Twain

“I would like to see anyone, prophet, king or God, convince a thousand cats to do the same thing at the same time.”
― Neil Gaiman

“Anyone who believes what a cat tells him deserves all he gets.”
― Neil Gaiman, Stardust

“Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat.”
― Mark Twain

“Never try to outstubborn a cat.”
― Robert A. Heinlein, Time Enough for Love

“The smallest feline is a masterpiece.”
― Leonardo da Vinci

“Time spent with a cat is never wasted.”
― Colette

“And how do you know that you're mad? "To begin with," said the Cat, "a dog's not mad. You grant that?" I suppose so, said Alice. "Well then," the Cat went on, "you see a dog growls when it's angry, and wags it's tail when it's pleased. Now I growl when I'm pleased, and wag my tail when I'm angry. Therefore I'm mad.”
― Lewis Carroll, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland & Through the Looking-Glass

“I love cats because I enjoy my home; and little by little, they become its visible soul.”
― Jean Cocteau

“To a Vase
"How do I break thee? Let me count the ways.
I break thee if thou art at any height
My paw can reach, when, smarting from some slight,
I sulk, or have one of my crazy days.
I break thee with an accidental graze
Or twitch of tail, if I should take a fright.
I break thee out of pure and simple spite
The way I broke the jar of mayonnaise.
I break thee if a bug upon thee sits.
I break thee if I'm in a playful mood,
And then I wrestle with the shiny bits.
I break thee if I do not like my food.
And if someone they shards together fits,
I'll break thee once again when thou art glued.”
― Henry N. Beard, Poetry for Cats: The Definitive Anthology of Distinguished Feline Verse

“I have lived with several Zen masters -- all of them cats.”
― Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment

“I am what I am. I would tell you what you want to know if I could, for you have been kind to me. But I am a cat, and no cat anywhere ever gave anyone a straight answer.”
― Peter S. Beagle, The Last Unicorn

“Authors like cats because they are such quiet, lovable, wise creatures, and cats like authors for the same reasons.”
― Robertson Davies

“The way to get on with a cat is to treat it as an equal - or even better, as the superior it knows itself to be.”
― Elizabeth Peters, The Snake, the Crocodile and the Dog

“There are no ordinary cats.”
― Colette

“Cats will amusingly tolerate humans only until someone comes up with a tin opener that can be operated with a paw.”
― Terry Pratchett, Men at Arms

“Is that vodka?" Margarita asked weakly.
The cat jumped up in his seat with indignation.
"I beg pardon, my queen," he rasped, "Would I ever allow myself to offer vodka to a lady? This is pure alcohol!”
― Mikhail Bulgakov, The Master and Margarita

“I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior.”
― Hippolyte A. Taine

“I believe cats to be spirits come to earth. A cat, I am sure, could walk on a cloud without coming through.”
― Jules Verne

“Cats can work out mathematically the exact place to sit that will cause most inconvenience.”
― Pam Brown

“Ignorant people think it is the noise which fighting cats make that is so aggravating, but it ain't so; it is the sickening grammar that they use.”
― Mark Twain

“My cat is not insane, she's just a really good actress.”
― P.C. Cast, Untamed

“I’m a cat. We aren’t required to make sense.”
― Seanan McGuire, A Local Habitation

“To err is human, to purr is feline.”
― Robert Byrne, The 2,548 Best Things Anybody Ever Said

“The problem with cats is that they get the same exact look whether they see a moth or an ax-murderer.”
― Paula Poundstone

“When Rome burned, the emperor's cats still expected to be fed on time.”
― Seanan McGuire, Rosemary and Rue

“As anyone who has ever been around a cat for any length of time well knows cats have enormous patience with the limitations of the human kind.”
― Cleveland Amory, The Cat Who Came for Christmas

“Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later.”
― Mary Bly

“Cats don't need to be possessed; they're evil on their own.”
― Peter Kreeft

“The cat wrinkled its nose and managed to look unimpressed. "Calling cats," it confided, "tends to be a rather overrated activity. Might as well call a whirlwind.”
― Neil Gaiman, Coraline

“No matter how much the cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens. ”
― Abraham Lincoln

“Cheshire Puss,' she began, rather timidly, as she did not at all know whether it would like the name: however, it only grinned a little wider. 'Come, it's pleased so far,' thought Alice, and she went on. 'Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?'
'That depends a good deal on where you want to get to,' said the Cat.
'I don't much care where—' said Alice.
'Then it doesn't matter which way you go,' said the Cat.
'—so long as I get SOMEWHERE,' Alice added as an explanation.
'Oh, you're sure to do that,' said the Cat, 'if you only walk long enough.”
― Lewis Carroll, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland & Through the Looking-Glass

“Once when I had remarked on the affection quite often found between cat and dog, my friend replied, "Yes. But I bet no dog would ever confess it to the other dogs.”
― C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves

“Cats were often familiars to workers of magic because to anyone used to wrestling with self-willed, wayward, devious magic--which was what all magic was--it was rather soothing to have all the same qualities wrapped up in a small, furry, generally attractive bundle that...might, if it were in a good mood, sit on your knee and purr. Magic never sat on anybody's knee and purred.”
― Robin McKinley, Spindle's End

“You know how cats do. They hide to die. Dogs come home.”
― Thomas Harris, Red Dragon

“I have found it is surprisingly difficult to remain sad when a cat is doing its level best to sandpaper one's cheeks.”
― R. L. LaFevers, Theodosia and the Last Pharaoh

“The cat dropped the rat between its two front paws. "There are those," it said with a sigh, in tones as smooth as oiled silk, "who have suggested that the tendency of a cat to play with its prey is a merciful one - after all, it permits the occasional funny little running snack to escape, from time to time. How often does your dinner get to escape?”
― Neil Gaiman, Coraline

“If a cat spoke, it would say things like 'Hey, I don’t see the problem here.”
― Roy Blount Jr.

“Maurice watched them argue again. Humans, eh? Think they're lords of creation. Not like us cats. We know we are. Ever see a cat feed a human? Case proven.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Amazing Maurice and His Educated Rodents

“Be careful with this one" said Dina, bending down to greet the cat. "All cats are half jinn, but I think she's three quarters.”
― G. Willow Wilson, Alif the Unseen

"A mousie squealing in a trap
Woke me from my morning nap.
Wasn't he so very sweet
To tell me it was time to eat?"
― Henry N. Beard, Poetry for Cats: The Definitive Anthology of Distinguished Feline Verse

“Prowling his own quiet backyard or asleep by the fire, he is still only a whisker away from the wilds.”
― Jean Burden, Celebration Of Cats

“Dogs own space and cats own time.”
― Nicola Griffith, Hild

“I have a cat, the pet that ranks just above a throw pillow in terms of required responsibility.”
― Anna Quindlen, Rise and Shine

“In the silence I heard Bastet, who had retreated under the bed, carrying on a mumbling, profane monologue. (If you ask how I knew it was profane, I presume you have never owned a cat.)”
― Elizabeth Peters, The Deeds of the Disturber

“Take it from cats
If someone moves to make room for you, take up more room. If someone is looking over there, there’s something to see. If somebody sneezes, run. If someone brings a bag into your home, look inside it. If you don’t want someone to leave, sit on his suitcase. Clean between your toes. Flaunt your full figure. Hide loose change. Even though you can take care of yourself, it’s okay to let someone be nice to you. It’s fine to take a nap on the laundry. If you stand in a kitchen long enough, someone will feed you. If you’re alone in bed, use all the pillows. Just because it’s gorgeous outside doesn’t mean you have to go outside. Just because you can fit into something tight doesn’t mean that you belong in it. If you trust someone, open yourself like a cheap umbrella. If you want to be left alone, park yourself in a closet. If you want to surprise someone, lie in a bathtub and then jerk back the curtain when he sits on the toilet. If you’re not interested, don’t look interested. You don’t have to chase every bird that you see.”
― Helen Ellis, American Housewife

“Cats randomly refuse to follow orders to prove they can.”
― Ilona Andrews, Magic Strikes

“The only thing a cat worries about is what's happening right now. As we tell the kittens, you can only wash one paw at a time.”
― Lloyd Alexander, Time Cat

“I realized that cats make a perfect audience, they don't laugh at you, they never contradict you, there's no need to impress them, and they won't divulge your secrets.”
― Elle Newmark, The Book of Unholy Mischief

“God made the cat to give man the pleasure of stroking a tiger.”
― Francois Joseph Mery

“The cat does not offer services. The cat offers itself. Of course he wants care and shelter. You don't buy love for nothing.”
― William S. Burroughs, The Cat Inside

“I am not a cat man, but a dog man, and all felines can tell this at a glance - a sharp, vindictive glance.”
― James Thurber

“Cats tell me without effort all that there is to know.”
― Charles Bukowski, On Cats

“A lie is like a cat: you need to stop it before it gets out the door or it’s really hard to catch.”
― Charles M. Blow

“I explained it loud
and clear. What part of "meow"
don't you understand?”
― Lee Wardlaw, Won-Ton: A Cat Tale Told in Haiku

“Most people, when they move, well they just move depending on whatever's around them. At this very moment, as I am writing, Constitution the cat is going by with her tummy dragging close to the floor. This cat has absolutely nothing constructive to do in life and still she is heading toward something, probably an armchair.”
― Muriel Barbery, The Elegance of the Hedgehog

“(about cats) They also resist our calls to come, to move, to obey, to present themselves, to do all the things that dogs do so easily. This drives some people crazy. Cats do not even care what drives us crazy!”
― Jeffery Masson

"A man said to the universe,
'Sir, I exist!'
'Excellent,' replied the universe,
'I've been looking for someone to take care of my cats.”
― Henry N. Beard, Poetry for Cats: The Definitive Anthology of Distinguished Feline Verse

“The End of the Raven

"On a night quite unenchanting, when the rain was downward slanting
I awakened to the ranting of the man I catch mice for.
Tipsy and a bit unshaven, in a tone I found quite craven,
Poe was talking to a Raven perched above the chamber door.
'Raven's very tasty,' thought I, as I tiptoed o'er the floor.
'There is nothing I like more.'
Still the Raven never fluttered, standing stock-still as he uttered
In a voice that shrieked and sputtered, his two cents' worth -- 'Nevermore.'
While this dirge the birdbrain kept up, oh, so silently I crept up,
Then I crouched and quickly leapt up, pouncing on the feathered bore.
Soon he was a heap of plumage, and a little blood and gore --
Only this and not much more.”
― Henry N. Beard, Poetry for Cats: The Definitive Anthology of Distinguished Feline Verse

“If a fish is the movement of water embodied, given shape, then cat is a diagram and pattern of suble air.”
― Doris Lessing, On Cats

“There is a kidney-shaped fish pool outside the picture window. I cleaned it out and put in some large goldfish I bought in a bait store. The cats are always trying to catch the fish, with no success. One time the white cat leapt for a frog across the pool. The frog dove in and the cat fell in. He is trouble-prone.”
― William S. Burroughs, The Cat Inside

“The dog appeals to cheap and facile emotions; the cat to the deepest founts of imagination and cosmic perception in the human mind. It is no accident that the contemplative Egyptians, together with such later poetic spirits as Poe, Gautier, Baudelaire, and Swinburne, were all sincere worshippers of the supple grimalkin.”
― H.P. Lovecraft, Cats and Dogs

“Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.”
― Jeff Valdez

“Most cats don't like water, and despite her pretensions of tigerhood, Julie was no different. Yes, tigers have stripes; so do tabbies. If you want to know the difference, try tossing one of each into your swimming pool. Then I would recommend running.”
― Seanan McGuire, Rosemary and Rue

“All those windows, and not a cat in them. All that light to bask in, wasted.”
― Lissa Warren The Good Luck Cat

“...if you've never been cussed out by a Siamese, you don't know what profanity is all about!”
― Lilian Jackson Braun, The Cat Who Saw Red

“Cats make one of the most satisfying sounds in the world: they purr. [...] Almost all cats make us feel good about ourselves because they let us know they feel good about us, about themselves, and about our relationship with them. A purring cat is a form of high praise, like a gold star on a test paper. It is a reinforcement of something we would all like to believe about ourselves -- that we are nice.”
― Roger A. Caras, A Celebration Of Cats

“Sometimes I like her calm, unwild,
gentle as a sleeping child,
and wonder as she lies, a fur ring,
curled upon my lap, unstirring --
is it me or Tibbles purring?”
― Ian Serraillier

“Sorry about the
squishy in your shoe. Must've
been something I ate.”
― Lee Wardlaw, Won-Ton: A Cat Tale Told in Haiku

“Poetry is like fish: if it’s fresh, it’s good; if it’s stale, it’s bad; and if you’re not certain, try it on the cat.”
― Osbert Sitwell

“Churchill and Roosevelt loved cats. Hitler and Napoleon hated them. That was a vastly reductive view on the matter, obviously, but it told you a lot.”
― Tom Cox

“I like cats, they never say i’m crazy.”
― Alain Bremond-Torrent, running is flying intermittently

“Give a cat a name you wouldn't mind shouting out in a strained, worried voice around midnight”
― Terry Pratchett

“Ove didn't dislike this cat in particular. It was just that he didn't much like cats in general. He'd always perceived them as untrustworthy. Especially when, as in the case of Ernest, they were as big as mopeds. It was actually quite difficult to determine whether he was just an unusually large cat or an outstandingly small lion. And you should never befriend something if there's a possibility it may take a fancy to eating you in your sleep.”
― Fredrik Backman, A Man Called Ove

“The next morning, as I picked an Eddie hair off my pant leg, I again considered the possibility of cats controlling the world. "It's possible," I muttered to myself as I dropped the hair into a wastebasket, "that they already do.”
― Laurie Cass, Borrowed Crime

“If you believe that nobody is noticing you in the society, it means that you forgot the cats!”
― Mehmet Murat ildan

“Most cats will do anything if you ask them nicely.”
― Erin Morgenstern, The Night Circus

“all cats have a Spanish tinge although Puss himself elegantly lubricates his virile, muscular, native Bergamasque with French, since that is the only language in which you can purr.”
― Angela Carter, The Bloody Chamber and Other Stories

“Rose Aylmer was Uncle Jack's cat. She was a beautiful yellow female Uncle Jack said was one of the few women he could stand permanently.”
― Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird

“Dogs kind of default to making friends unless provoked. Cats seem to default to making enemies unless convinced otherwise.”
― Perry Elisabeth Kirkpatrick, The 12 Cats of Christmas

“Children are like cats, only less useful and less furry.”
― Mark Lawrence, Red Sister

“Golden Rule: If you like cats, you should have a bunch.”
― Jennifer McCartney, The Joy of Leaving Your Sh*t All Over the Place: The Art of Being Messy

“There is no creature better at delicate rudeness than a cat...”
― Elizabeth Peters

“That's the great secret of creativity. You treat ideas like cats: you make them follow you. If you try to approach a cat and pick it up, hell, it won't let you do it. You've got to say, "Well, to hell with you." And the cat says, "Wait a minute. He's not behaving the way most humans do." Then the cat follows you out of curiosity: "Well, what's wrong with you that you don't love me?”
― Ray Bradbury, Zen in the Art of Writing

“After dark, all cats are leopards.”
― Alison Davies, Be More Cat: Life Lessons from Our Feline Friends

“I always imagined that cats were the Paris Hiltons of the pet world: They didn't quite deserve all the attention but they got it anyway.”
― Sarah Andersen, Big Mushy Happy Lump

“I signed off with Ricky, and I was putting away my phone when TC slunk past, heading for his spot in the front window.
"Hey, cat," I said. "We're bringing home a friend for you. A doggie big enough to devour you in a single gulp. Is that okay?"
He turned a baleful stare on me, as if he understood. I'm convinced TC isn't just a cat, no more than Lloergan is just a dog. Maybe someday, when I'm moments from perishing at the hands of an intruder, TC will save me in a sudden and awe-inspiring display of supernatural power. Or maybe he'll decide I haven't given him enough tuna that week and leave me to my fate. He's a cat, so I figure my chances are about fifty-fifty.”
― Kelley Armstrong, Rituals

“I fall short of her standards. She made me buy cat food that hasn't been tested on animals. My cats took one bite of it, spit it out, and yelled, "Did no one test this?”
― Paula Poundstone, The Totally Unscientific Study of the Search for Human Happiness

“Last time I saw her, she was peeking out from one of the bookcases next to the fireplace. She's the first cat I've ever seen trying to pretend she's a condensed version of War and Peace.”
― Ellen Hart, Hallowed Murder

“The man who will not defend the honour of his cat cannot be trusted to defend anything.”
― Robert Lynd, The Pleasures of Ignorance

“When you're fighting a crowd, it's good to shout potentially threatening things like "Crossbows!" or "Fire!" or "Giant Flying Cat!" every once in a while.”
― Sebastien de Castell, Traitor's Blade

“It would seem very silly to start a conversation with a common hedgehog. They are not at all like cats, who surely understand the human language.”
― Erin Forbes, Fire & Ice: The Elementals

“Er, excuse me,' said the man as Nanny Ogg turned away, 'but what is that on your shoulders?'
'It's. . . a fur collar,' said Nanny.
'Excuse me, but I just saw it flick its tail.'
'Yes. I happen to believe in beauty without cruelty.”
― Terry Pratchett

“There are many intelligent beings in the Universe. Most of them are owned by cats.”
― Old Polish Proverb

“There was a sort of gallery structure in the roof space which held a bed and also a bathroom which you could actually swing a cat in. But only if it was a reasonably patient cat and didn’t mind a few nasty cracks about the head.”
― Douglas Adams, So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish

“A cat is basically a great egomaniac who keeps the human company as long as it pleases itself.”
― M.Z.Riffi

“Are you here for a reason, Cheshire?
Why, yes, I would enjoy a cup of tea. I take mine with lots of cream, and no tea. Thank you.”
― Marissa Meyer, Heartless
“Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God.”
― Jeff Valdez

“Cat herding is simple. Just drag a string behind you.”
― Aaron Dennis

“The mathematical probability of a common cat doing exactly as it pleases is the one scientific absolute in the world.”
― Lynn M. Osband

“Toilet paper unrolled and slithered
then wrapped around my tummy.
That paper tried to roll me up
into an Egyptian mummy.”
― Melinda K. Trotter, Pixie the Night Watch Cat

“Tramps and vagabonds have marks they make on gateposts and trees and doors, letting others of their kind know a little about the people who live at the houses and farms they pass on their travels. I think cats must leave similar signs; how else to explain the cats who turn up at our door through the year, hungry and flea-ridden and abandoned?”
― Neil Gaiman, M Is for Magic

“Cats strongly believe that everywhere is designed for their comfort!”
― Mehmet Murat ildan

“Rowl felt sure that Bridget's fragile feelings would be crushed if he denied her the pleasure of sharing her meat with him.”
― Jim Butcher, The Aeronaut's Windlass

“You can flip a coin but Schrodinger's pet cat will still be in that box.”
― Scott Edward Shjefte

“By associating with the cat, one only risks becoming richer.”
― Colette

“I wrote a book on cats. In retrospect, I should have used paper, cause chapter six got hit by a car.”
― Wynne McLaughlin

“#Cats are marvelous creatures - they either adapt to circumstances, or decide to make circumstances adapt to them. Either way - they win.”
― Will Advise, Nothing is here...

“If we all learnt cat-speak, we would often find they are saying, “You stupid human, I am trying to tell you something important right now!”
― Leah Broadby, A Dreadful Daughter's Spells

“A cat is always on the wrong side of any door.”
― Pam Brown, Cuddly Cats

“I think I would rather have a cat than a sweetheart, after all. They are less trouble, and even the handsomest sweetheart is sadly lacking in fur.”
― Laura Amy Schlitz, The Hired Girl

“Once you take the cat out of the bag, you can't cram it back in.”
― Jen Calonita, There's No Place Like Home

“Cats have been all over the Internet for many years. This makes total sense, as they seem to spend half their lives trying to stand and sit on the keyboards of our laptops.”
― Tom Cox, The Good, the Bad and the Furry: Life with the World's Most Melancholy Cat and Other Whiskery Friends

“Floyd arrived in the kitchen and leapt onto Casper’s back, then proceeded to start biting his neck. I’m an only child with a smallish family who had never done Christmas in a big way, but there was something about having two male cats tenderly humping in the corner of the room that made the occasion a little more festive.”
― Tom Cox, The Good, the Bad and the Furry: Life with the World's Most Melancholy Cat and Other Whiskery Friends

“I've been told that my belly is soft as a fluffy cloud. No one can resist my magical belly. Not even grumpy humans.”
― Yasmine Surovec, My Pet Human

“One of the good things about cats is that, unlike dogs, they don’t come up to you in the street and try to have sex with your leg.”
― Tom Cox, The Good, the Bad and the Furry: Life with the World's Most Melancholy Cat and Other Whiskery Friends

“...staring into thin air at those things only cats can see.”
― Stephen King, Doctor Sleep

“When she bought the cats her mother asked her straight out if they were 'baby substitutes'. 'No,' Ruth had answered, straight-faced. 'They're kittens. If I had a baby it would be a cat substitute.”
― Elly Griffiths, The Crossing Places

“Cats aren’t special advisers. They advise us all the time, whether we want them to or no.”
― Tamora Pierce, Wolf-Speaker

“Besides, you’re a cat. It’s your nature to think you’rer the center of the universe."
She stared at him blankly. "But I am the center of the universe.”
― Rick Riordan, The Serpent's Shadow

“Dogs will give you unconditional love until the day they die. Cats will make you pay for every mistake you've ever made since the day you were born.”
― Oliver Gaspirtz, A Treasury of Pet Humor

Oliver Gaspirtz
“Dogs are like kids. Cats are like roommates.”
― Oliver Gaspirtz, A Treasury of Pet Humor

“Who would vandalize a doghouse? I ask.
"Cats?" Bee suggests.”
― Paula Stokes, The Art of Lainey

“Wasn't growing catnip in one's yard the kitty equivalent of giving candy to children?”
― Caroline Paul, Lost Cat: A True Story of Love, Desperation, and GPS Technology

“Never try to out-stubborn a cat.”
― Robert Heinlein

“Wait a minute. Wait just a hairball kakking minute.”
― Jody Wallace, The Whole Truth

“But there was a kitten on my pillow, and it was purring in my face and vibrating gently with every purr, and, very soon, I slept.”
― Neil Gaiman, The Ocean at the End of the Lane

“Roen said, "I can't quit. I have rent, and a cat to support.”
― Wesley Chu, The Lives of Tao

“Purr more, hiss less”
― Linda C. Marchman

“When the mouse laughs at the cat, there's a hole nearby.”
― Nigerian Proverb

“There is no known cure for severe affection for one's cat. The only way to relieve the symptoms is to go ahead and launch a kiss attack.”
― Tichakorn Khroopan Hill

“Majid gave me a brief dazzling golden stare and then half-lidded his eyes again. I know when my life is being threatened.”
― Robin McKinley, Shadows

“my cat is always looking at me like i am forgetting something crucial and he depends on it”
― Megan Boyle, Selected Unpublished Blog Posts of a Mexican Panda Express Employee

“No one had ever accused Koko of being naughty. Perverse, perhaps, or arrogant, or despotic. But naughtiness was beneath his dignity.”
― Lilian Jackson Braun

“She loves the smell of his fur, all warm and musky and cat-spit clean.”
― Sara Stark, An Untold Want

“Annette sighs. Manfred's been upgrading this robot cat for years, and his ex-wife Pamela used to mess with its neural configuration, too: This is its third body, and it's getting more realistically uncooperative with every hardware upgrade. Sooner or later it's going to demand a litter tray and start throwing up on the carpet.”
― Charles Stross, Accelerando

“Hers was an unconditional love– so long as you kept the food coming. Realizing that what attracted her to me needn’t have been anything more complicated than my having a warm body to nestle in and plentiful food in her bowl, still I felt that she loved me because at least a warm body was something I was already. Being loved for something I already was, no matter how surface oriented, was still better than being loved for the person I might be changed or mistakenly perceived to be.”
― Tommy Walker, Monstrous: The Autobiography of a Serial Killer But for the Grace of God

“Let the cats rule the world; first thing they will do is to increase the number of mousetraps! Let the rats rule the world; first thing they will do is to increase the number of dogs!”
― Mehmet Murat ildan

“My cat brought me a toy. I thanked her and threw it. She sat there gave me a look that made me realize people and dogs are the crazy ones.”
― Dan Harmon

“Even cats have questions – like “Can’t you see my bowl is empty?” or “Why don’t you turn off the ***! rain now?” From their perspective we are gods!”
― Jay Woodman

“I prefer cats to people, for the most part. Most people aren't cute,
& if they are cute they rapidly outgrow it”
― William S. Burroughs

“A happy arrangement: many people prefer cats to other people, and many cats prefer people to other cats.”
― Mason Cooley

“Then the cow asked:
"What is a mirror?"
"It is a hole in the wall," said the cat. "You look in it, and there you see the picture, and it is so dainty and charming and ethereal and inspiring in its unimaginable beauty that your head turns round and round, and you almost swoon with ecstasy.”
― Mark Twain, Short Stories

“The human race can be roughly divided into two categories: ailurophiles and ailurophobes - cat lovers and the underprivileged.”
― David Taylor, You and Your Cat

“If you make a fool of yourself in front of a cat, he will sneer at you, if you are sober; he will leave the room if you are drunk. If you make a fool of yourself in front a dog, he will make a fool of himself, too.”
― Chuck Jones

“Don't judge a cat by its coat.”
― Magdalena VandenBerg

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